Well, broke my posting every day streak. Didn’t have any reviews and wasn’t inspired enough to write up anything else. Only one review down below, it took me a long time to get through this story and that’s not a good thing. Also, new discoveries while I work on putting links on the giant list of doom. Found out that one story is not actively listed on the author’s list of works, but the direct link still works. Also ran across a story that seems to simply not exist. Probably deleted by the author, which is a pity because it was a decent story.
First off, a note I wrote at the start of the story so I wouldn’t forget it. The third chapter of this story is probably the best mixed-up dreamstate scene I’ve read. Probably because it hasn’t been that long since I finished the previous story in the series, so each line of the dream referencing a event of that story sparks a fresh mental image in my head. The references so seamlessly stitched together that it was like one memory didn’t have enough time to get out of the way before the next memory popped in, so it occasionally felt like the scenes were intersecting in my head as I was reminded of them. The mixed-up state assisted even more by the references were in more or less random order, so my brain kept trying to put them in the right chronological flow and failing. All of that with a mostly normal writing style so that someone who didn’t read the previous story might find it a bit odd, but it wouldn’t be horribly disjointed or anything.
Now for the right after finishing thoughts. This story was something of a wreck. The first story of the series (Austraeoh) I really enjoyed. It was clever, had fun worldbuilding elements, implied things that were never explained directly, and in a novel’s worth of text it crammed three story arcs and a framing device, each of which could have been a whole novel itself. This story was repetitive, had no real worldbuilding elements, was slow as heck, and had what was basically a third of a story stretched out into novel length. After the first story I was eager to see what happens next. This story killed any and all interest in what happens at all. Especially the last quarter of it or so. Which was the evil guy doing evil things and really repetitive meaningless action scenes that did nothing. Rainbow Dash is exactly as awesome as she needs to be to survive a fight, and no more. Somewhere in the middle of the story she fights one-on-one with a bounty hunter cyborg pony that is feared far and wide and is known for being strong enough to take on entire battalions of soldiers at once. It’s a hard fight, but Rainbow Dash wins in the end. Then, near the end of the story Rainbow Dash goes one-on-one with the evil villain of the piece and has a hard fight, and then loses. Even though everything points toward the evil villain is not nearly as tough an opponent. Plus we get scenes of Rainbow Dash avoiding cannons and fighter-gliders from a entire fleet of airships, dodging and avoiding volleys of hundreds of missiles and cannons and energy weapons. Over and over and over again. And over again. By the end I was pretty much just skimming the story because I was honestly feeling fatigue from so much pointless and meaningless action scene prose.
Plus the editing isn’t as good. I noticed several words that were missing letters, and pretty sure I ran across some sentences that were missing words. Nothing big, but a simple spellcheck run-through should catch typos like missing letters. I would have to be convinced that the next story is really awesome to give it a try. This one not only wrecked my enthusiasm I had gotten from the first story, but pushed me right down into negative after.
Sweet romance story. Just a short little moment between Princess Celestia and Twilight Sparkle (alicorn version). Well written, if nothing special. Not part of the story itself, but this one made me realize how much a lot of the fan fiction blends together in my head. This story is a tiny little slice all by itself, not even really much of a story, but while reading it my brain just sort of slotted it into the Celestia/Twilight romantic relationship plot built up from all the fan fiction about that relationship. Even thinking of it as something of a prequel to that one story that is quite a bit in the future after their relationship goes sour. Just was a interesting thought I had, how it all sort of flows together regardless of author or continuity.